I have had a full time job since... well since I was in high school - I have ALWAYS worked. Four weeks after I had Jaxon I started working again, luckily I was able to work from home so I could still be with him, but I was working none the less. I thought that it would be easier to work from home, but it was the opposite. I constantly felt guilty when I was working that I wasn't paying attention to my adorable son, and when I was playing with Jaxon, I continued to think about everything I wasn't getting done for work and I would stress and have to stay up late or get up really early to get it all done which was really hard. I felt like I wasn't able to give 100% to either thing.
Before we moved to Texas Dan and I decided that it would be best if I quit my job and focused on being a mom to Jaxon. I have loved being able to give him 100% of my attention, but I have to be honest, I don't know what to do now to fill up my extra time. I know it's hard to believe that I have extra time, but I guess because I have always worked and been able to juggle all of it, I feel like I am being lazy now. I get up, make a yummy breakfast, we eat, I clean up, we play play play, I feed Jax a snack, we play some more, Jaxon goes down for a 3 hour nap, Jaxon wakes up, we play, I start dinner, we eat dinner, I clean up dinner while Dan plays with Jax, we all play, we put Jaxon to bed, I clean up any other messes there are to clean up - Dan does any last studying or homework, then we spend some time together go to bed. Now reading that it doesn't sound like I have "extra" time, but while Jax and I are playing I can be doing things - a lot of times I clean while he is playing with his toys so I have the full 3 hours while he is napping to do something. Normally, I would get 3 hours of good working time in, now I'm not sure what to do. I don't have friends here yet and we just moved into the ward so I don't have a calling yet that I can do stuff with, we only have one car so Dan takes it to school unless I have something I need it for then I drop him off and pick him up, and we don't have extra money, so I am not sure what to do - and I feel guilty if I lay down or watch TV or something - I guess I could work out but usually when Jax goes down for his nap I am pretty worn out - I feel like a bad mom or that I'm really lazy for having free time and I don't know what to do - I need a hobby. I used to never have free time and now that I do - I'm not sure what to do with it.
Oh Lisa, I'm sure you will find something to do. I know that my time would be consumed with trying to organize our tiny apartment! But here are a few ideas that I plan to do when I get to stay home. You could print out the pictures from your computer and put them into photo albums! or, go to this website and make "tot school" things for Jax: http://confessionsofahomeschooler.blogspot.com. I've looked at it and really want to try to do this stuff on the weekends with Owen. You could also bake! Baking is always fun, but then you'd probably need to work out too because I always eat what I make. I hope you figure out something. If I were able to stay home I'd say just call me and we could talk! I love you and am so glad you're able to give Jax all your time and attention now.
ReplyDeleteFree time is good. You take it when you can. And you should take a little time here and there to do whatever you want, even if it is just watch a t.v. show. ;) The older the kids get the less free time you seem to have, so seriously enjoy it now. I mean as long as you aren't neglecting things then you can acknowledge the free time as a reward for your hard work and ability to get enough done that you have free time.
ReplyDeleteGlad you guys are doing well out there!
I always am so exhausted I have to take a nap with Elise. I don't know what I'll do when we have another kid. We'll have to wait til she's six and can be by herself while I nap :)
ReplyDeleteWhen I have gotten enough sleep, I end up cleaning and cooking. That way I can spend more time with Elise. But she doesn't like me doing those things while she's playing. She wants me in the room she's in even if she isn't playing with me.
And other than that I do indulge in a audio book or tv show while I do computer stuff like blogging. I also have put together a few
sewing projects or craft projects.
There is some extra time but only some days for me so I don't feel so bad for taking advantage of it.